Monday, 29 July 2019

2 problems with my left eye

Five and a half months ago on the 15th of February 2019, I found out that when I move my eyes I can see a momentary white crescent in my left eye only.  It only lasts a fraction of a second before disappearing.  This can be most clearly seen against a light background, such as the sky or a white wall, and is roughly in the centre of the visual field of my left eye.

I went to the doctors a few days later and he said I might possibly be in danger of getting a detached retina and I should go to the eye clinic at a hospital 15 miles away to get it checked out.  I was surprised since my symptom doesn't appear on the danger signs for a detached retina, but his advice freaked me out enough to attend the hospital the very next day on the 20th of February. I did that and got a pupil dilation exam. I got drops put in my eye to widen the pupil and a light shone in my eye to check if my retina is OK.  She didn't find anything.  5.5 months later the crescent of light (or curved white line) seems to be somewhat diminished compared to what it was initially.  However, from the date of my pupil dilation exam, I've experienced a second problem with my left eye.  Here's the message I sent to Specsavers (an opticians) earlier today that outlines the problem:
Hi, I wonder if you could give me some advice.
Ever since a pupil dilation exam in my left eye 5 months ago, I occasionally experience a circular patch in the centre of my left eye vision once every couple of days or so (but very random). I can only really notice this circle if I look at the sky, sometimes I need to move my eye for it to appear.  Kinda white specks in a circle with the circle gradually decreasing in size lasting from 5 mins to 15 mins. I can see through it.  Just very slightly distorts my vision at that spot when I look at text etc. My vision is fine at any other time outside those 5-15 min episodes. I'm completely convinced it was brought on by the pupil dilation exam. 
I can bring on this circle at will by either:
i) Bending my head right down and leaving it there for 30 secs to 1 min or so, then straightening up.
ii) Looking close up into something like an empty mug, moving the mug around so it reflects the light slightly differently, and then the visual anomaly (the circle) appears.
And sometimes they appear to come on randomly.  Perhaps more often when I'm stressed, but I'm unsure.
Some of these episodes were much worse near the beginning in the first few weeks after the pupil dilation exam. These worst episodes seemed to last around 20 mins and sometimes I could see a kinda spot of light at the end (one was like a small shiny equilateral triangle). Past 2 months it seems around the same, short mild episodes, but not sure if getting better which is concerning to me.
Incidentally, I suffer from silent migraines where I don't get a headache and get scintillating scotoma in both eyes.  Last episode was in December.  Perhaps what I have now is a retinal/ocular migraine, but symptoms are extremly mild compared to my silent migraines and what the net says about retinal migraines. 
OK, not sure what to do.  Fairly reluctant to get another pupil dilation exam as it was that which somehow initiated it in the first place! But will it sort itself out?  Much appreciate any advice.

OK, I would imagine a sensible response from them would be to say something along the lines that my symptoms and the fact it was initially caused by a pupil dilation exam, rules out a great many conditions, and perhaps narrows it down to a unique condition.  And, even if a serious condition remains a possibility, in light of the fact that the severity of the visual anomaly has decreased in the months since it first started and that either pupil dilation or a bright light being shone in my eye caused the problem in the first place, it would be foolish to subject myself to similar testing at this juncture.  That it would be best to wait and only risk any such tests should the symptom worsen.

The guy from Specsavers never said anything like that...

I received a telephone call from Specsavers about 2 hours after I sent the above message.  The guy said I should go to the hospital and get an OCT scan and asked me if he should arrange an appointment.  He gave no other information! I asked what are the most likely conditions that could cause the symptoms I've mentioned.  He replied that he cannot say without getting appropriate tests done on me.  The Specsavers guy ruled out nothing. I mentioned the possibility of glaucoma, and he never even ruled out that.  Incidentally, I keep getting the exact same message from other specialists, including ophthalmologists.  They tend to say they cannot give a diagnosis without tests.

Of course, I never ask for a diagnosis. I always ask, given my symptoms, what is the most probable cause of the issue I'm experiencing. Clearly, certain conditions will have certain prior probabilities. Providing one's symptoms must necessarily alter these probabilities, but every specialist I have communicated with effectively denies this. It as if I were to go and see my GP with some ailment, and when asked to describe the condition, I said there's no point in me doing so because my symptoms will not give you a definitive diagnosis. The utter nonsense of this beggars belief (I said something like all this to the guy from Specsavers, but he was completely unmoved and kept repeating that I have to be tested.  I eventually hung up on him).

Worse still, people -- including the guy from Specsavers -- are doubting that the pupil dilation exam caused this problem in the first place. I explain that the symptoms were the worst on the day of the exam after it had finished and that before the exam this circular visual anomaly had been entirely absent. I further explain it is bordering on outlandish to suppose that this problem suddenly came on, all by itself, right after the pupil dilation exam -- that it was pure happenstance! At the very least it is extraordinarily unlikely. I'm still apparently not getting believed. This is important, because if the relevant specialist doesn't believe me about this, then I may well be subjected to tests that investigate possible conditions that the original pupil dilation exam couldn't have possibly brought on.

So all this puts me in a bit of a dilemma about what to do now. Leave it and hope the problem eventually resolves or at least doesn't get any worse? Probably the best option, unless there are tests that can be carried out that don't involve a light being shone in my eye. But I'm kinda hostile to any such testing procedures as well as taking meds. I always seem to get assured that some procedure or med is perfectly safe, only to discover they're talking nonsense.

I decided to write this as it will be of interest to anyone who experiences similar problems (whether the crescent of light or this circular fuzzy patch). I'll keep it updated as or when anything relevant happens.

Update 31/7/2019 2 days since I wrote the above.  I decided to ring up the doctors this morning for an appointment today.  Saw this lady doctor.  I described my symptoms.  She didn't seem all that interested in what's mainly freaking me out; namely the fact that when I look down I can precipitate this circular visual anomaly.  She was saying I'll be noticing things more.  That's true, but this visual anomaly is definitely new! That is, it wasn't there before the pupil dilation exam on the 20th of February.

Anyway, unlike everyone else, she never insinuated it was coincidence that the pupil dilation exam triggered it on the 20th February. She did say though that it may have aggravated an existing disposition towards glaucoma. Yep, that is possible and I thought of this myself beforehand. So, there's an outside possibility I may have glaucoma!

She told me to ring up specsavers to book an appointment to test for glaucoma consisting of an eye pressure test and peripheral vision test.  I rang them up when I got home.  Unfortunately, I got the same guy who I hung up on 2 days ago!  He didn't seem pleased at me. He said there's no spare time slots anytime soon (I think he was being genuine about this rather than simply being awkward).  So I rang up this other opticians and booked an appointment for Friday at 2pm.  Will update then!

Update 2/8/2019  I've just got back.  Carried out quite a few tests, not just the 2 the doc suggested.  My eyes appear to be perfectly healthy! Definitely not glaucoma.   One interesting thing is that my eye pressure is 14 in left eye and only 10 in my right, but 7 months ago they were both 10.  She didn't think this was any cause for concern though.  In fact normal pressure is supposed to be from 10 to 21.  Glaucoma normally is precipitated with high eye pressure.

So she doesn't know what's precipitating both of these 2 conditions.  She mentioned migraine, but also said there's a remote possibility of vascular problems.  They are just the options left once eliminating all known problems with the eye.

I was quite impressed with the lady who carried out the tests.  Better than specsavers.

So, it's good news!  But I'll keep updating when anything else happens.

Update 4/8/2019  Just discovered I cannot induce this circle in the mornings.  It seems it only occurs from around 1.30pm onwards, although its frequency doesn't appear to increase after this time. So lying horizontal for hours prevents it occurring for a few hours, unless it's actual sleep that is the pertinent factor here.  Doubt this has significance, but I'll email the lady who examined me 2 days ago, just in case.

Update 5/8/2019  

It seems my discovery yesterday might be more ominous than I imagined. Yesterday I emailed the optician I visited on Friday. I received a reply from the receptionist saying:

Thank you for the information. It doesn't alter things from the point of view of your eyes but may be useful for the GP to know. Your letter has been sent to the GP so you will need to book an appointment.

I already know it won't make any difference with regards to any possible problem with my eye since any such problem has effectively been ruled out.  I meant of course whether it has any significance to whatever it is that might be causing the problem.

I was aware the optician was sending off the details to my doctor, but I wasn't told I need to book an appointment!  So, I'm wondering if this information I gave is significant.  The optician mentioned either an ocular migraine, or possible vascular problem.  I wonder if it's more likely to be a vascular problem now??

Mind you, it was the receptionist that emailed me, so maybe there's been a little confusion.  I was under the impression that the doctor may want to see me if they feel it is warranted, but that my default action was to do nothing unless contacted. And certainly the doctor whom I saw last Wednesday didn't mention anything about coming back if an eye problem is eliminated.

Have emailed back for clarification saying,

I need to book an appointment with a GP because of this additional info?  Or I need to book an appointment regardless?

 but no response as of yet.


This nightmare just keeps going on and on and on...

5 mins later:
Just received an email saying:
No you need to book an appointment regardless of this information.
So, why wasn't I told this originally?  God's sake!
Update 9/8/19  A major episode last night just before I went to bed.  Haven't seen it this bad since 4th April, over 4 months ago.  It had a dark spot in the centre of the fuzzy circle.  OK, I reckon it was the eye exam of a week ago today that's made these major episodes more likely again.  I really must stop allowing people to shine very bright lights in my left eye!

The other possibility is that this major episode just happened anyway.  That possibility makes it more worrying and I feel I should book an appointment with a doctor to test for any vascular problems.  Although can vascular problems arise or at least be exacerbated by a bright light?  There's all sorts of questions I should have asked the ophthalmologist from a week ago!


Update 4/5/20  Been a long time since my last update -- 9 months!

OK, the original arc problem. Now have definitively established it is part of a ring. Sometimes I can see a full ring. On the other hand it is vastly fainter than it used to be. Also I mentioned it might be part of a ring back on the 2nd of August when I went for my appointment at the opticians. The lady who tested me was indifferent at that information. So I think this will probably get fainter and fainter until it disappears and probably not much to worry about. Probably PVD (posterior vitreous detachment).

OK, the circular fuzzy circle. This too seems to be diminishing in severity over time. Still lasts between 5 to 12 mins or so, but it is now scarcely affecting my vision at all. Also, now when I bend my head over for 30 secs to 2 mins, it no longer triggers it. It still seems though to come on when I tend to bend my head slightly and look at small text.

One slightly worrying development is that since the 7th of April it is now being triggered around twice a week when looking at my monitor. It's many months since this has happened and I appeared to cure this before by turning down my brightness. But this is now occurring in spite having my brightness and contrast both pretty low. So why is it getting worse here? I have no idea!

Sunday, 28 July 2019

No afterlife apparently gives life meaning

I've just read the following article:

In praise of atheism: How believing in nothing gives my life meaning


He says:
I know there is nothing beyond – no saving grace, no great scorekeeper in the sky.
Interesting so many people know this, but are unable to convey how they know it. Perhaps they've had some mystical insight, a sudden epiphanic enlightenment into the nature of all things and realised that nothing means anything. Or . . . perhaps they've just passively absorbed the message our culture gives...

And is it really plausible that today will be less meaningful should you believe in an afterlife? Say you're watching a movie that you're really enjoying. But then you suddenly remember you believe there's an afterlife and an ultimate purpose to your life. Oh no! Your enjoyment plummets? I scarcely think so!

To be fair, I think the idea here is that we will accomplish less if we are immortal.  It's the fact that our lives are so very short that gives us the urgency to achieve things. If we live forever, there's always tomorrow, so why not just relax today?

I'm not sure what would be the ultimate point of acheiving things if life has no ultimate meaning.  But, apart from that, if one believes in an afterlife, one is not saying that we will live forever in this life.  We have a certain number of days left before we depart this world, and we can't be sure of what will happen to us after that.  But whatever happens in the afterlife, we won't be able to complete anything we do in this life.

It's kinda like a meme this idea that life is only worth living if this is the only life. Some famous philosopher says it, then all the unthinking masses repeat it. The fact that it is patently nonsense does nothing to stop people repeating it.


Friday, 26 July 2019

Alerts for when new books are published

I was hoping I could find somewhere on the net where I can enter authors names and get an email alert when a new book by them is published. Can't find anywhere apart from "following" each of the authors on Amazon. But I was a bit leery of doing that fearing Amazon will inundate me with emails rather than just informing me when a new book comes out. But 2 days ago I did it anyway. My fears were justified. Just got an email alert for a new book by this author, but it was released 2 months ago in May! (and I knew about it already having just followed him 2 days ago). Why is it so impossible to get email alerts for just new books?

Update: 15 minutes later.  And now I've just received an alert for a book that isn't being released until October! Grrr . .bollox to this. I'd best unfollow them all. I knew this would happen!

Thursday, 25 July 2019

Dr. William B. Province's view

Dr. William B. Provine, now deceased but who used to be Professor of Biological Sciences at Cornell University, once said the following:

There are no gods, no purposes, no goal-directed forces of any kind. There is no life after death. When I die, I am absolutely certain that I am going to be dead. That’s the end for me. There is no ultimate foundation for ethics, no ultimate meaning to life, and no free will for humans, either.

Well, thanks for letting us know William!

No purposes? No goal directed forces of any kind? Hmmm . . . so how do iphones come into existence? By sheer happenstance?

Friday, 19 July 2019

Chunky haddock in batter

Haddock and cod taste about equally nice, they're about equal in price, but on average haddock only contains half the level of mercury.  So, especially with my health anxiety,  I would much prefer to buy haddock where possible.  I used to buy the own brand supermarket versions of chunky haddock in batter from places like Tesco, Morrisons and Lidl where the haddock fillet comprises 65% of the ingredients and is by far the cheapest option for buying haddock.

Unfortunely, one by one, all the supermarkets I shop at have stopped selling chunky haddock in batter.  All of the other three alternatives; namely chunky haddock in breadcrumbs, chunky cod in batter, chunky cod in breadcrumbs, are all still available in all these supermarkets, but not the fourth option I want.

Presumably people are buying cod rather than haddock and have a preference for breadcrumbs over batter.  So the supermarkets simply do not consider it financially viable to stock chunky haddock in batter, at least not for the same price as the other three alternatives.  I bet people wouldn't buy cod in preference to haddock it it were well known about the respective mercury content of these two fish!  But anyway...

I have emailed various complaints to the supermarkets.  One response from Tesco suggested I buy their haddock goujons.  On the 7th November 2018 I responded with the following:

Thanks for your suggestion I try the haddock goujons. The Tesco Battered Haddock Goujons are on current special offer of £2 instead of £3.20 for 200g.  Even with the special offer it is £10 per kg. The haddock comprises 52% and the batter 48%.

The battered chunky haddock was £6 per kg and 65% haddock, 35% batter, and this was the proper price i.e not on special offer.

We can work out how much the actual haddock costs per kg in each respective case by dividing the price per kg by the proportion of the product which is actual haddock.  In the case of the goujons it is 10/0.52 = £19.23 per kg.  In the case of the chunky haddock it is 6/0.65 = £9.23 per kg

So £19.23 per kg for the haddock goujons, and £9.23 per kg for the chunky haddock.

We also need to bear in mind the goujons are on "special offer".  They are normally £3.20 rather than £2.00.  So normally the price per kg would be 3.20/2.00 * 10 = £16 per kg. So for the actual haddock the price per kg would be 16/0.52 = £30.77 per kg.

So normally it would be £30.77 per kg for the haddock goujons, and £9.23 per kg for the chunky haddock.

Moreover, since the chunky haddock is 65% haddock, compared to 52% haddock for the goujons, the chunky haddock tastes much nicer.  Furthermore, it'll be healthier too since generally haddock is deemed to be a healthy food, and batter is something we ought to try and minimise.

For the above reasons I do not regard the haddock goujons option as being desirable.

Incidentally, at this point in my post, I thought I would check the price of these haddock goujons to see if nine months later they are now the proper price (i.e not on special offer). Lo and behold they are on special offer again for the same price!  It is clear that items that are frequently claimed to be on "special offer" are nothing of the sort.  That is, the supermarkets are lying about them being on special offer. This is the real normal price, where as the "normal" price is an inflated price. They do this to encourage people to buy the item.  Marketing tactics such as labelling battered blobs of haddock as battered haddock goujons will also encourage people to buy them.  Compare "would you like some haddock blobs sweetheart?" to "would you like some haddock goujons sweetheart?".

Anyway, I've been stuck with buying haddock in breadcrumbs for the past few months.  Not as nice as batter :-(.  Do other people really prefer the taste of breadcrumbs to batter?  Or is it that they think breadcrumbs are more healthy?  Or perhaps they just buy fish in breadcrumbs out of habit without really thinking about it? 





Wednesday, 17 July 2019

The Reincarnation of Princess Diana?




I read this article.*  The parents of a boy claims their boy appears to remember being Princess Diana in a former life. It's also covered by many other newspapers, at least the popular ones eg the mail, but no further details are added.


Philosophically I see no reason why reincarnation shouldn't occur. And there is good evidence for it in the form of young children apparently recollecting a previous life  (Although I do not regard hypnotic regression as providing compelling evidence).  However, I highly doubt that this child was Princess Diana.  If one is claiming their child remembers a former life, out of all the billions of people that have ever lived who would draw the most attention from the general populace?  I'm not sure, but presumably Princess Diana would be near the top?  This is a very good reason to be deeply sceptical in this instance. Much more likley to be a hoax or a publicity stunt. As I've said before, I'm very sceptical about claims of a previous famous life.

*Update  For some strange reason I cannot link to it on blogger.  See the mail article instead or I link to it in my facebook group here.

Sunday, 7 July 2019

Vultures and a Jackal

Nice and polite for them to wait.


Update 29/08/2019:  Just noticed the tweet is no longer there.  I just wish I could work out someway of actually saving these videos/gifs on twitter..

Saturday, 6 July 2019

An infinite Universe would be seriously weird


An infinite homogeneous and isotropic Universe would be interesting. About a googolplex of light years away there would be a planet exactly like us with people like us doing the exact same things as we're doing. It would be absolutely identical to Earth. And on average around another googolplex light years further there would be another identical Earth. Indeed there would be an infinite number of identical Earths. It's a seriously weird notion.  I think an infinite Universe is implausible for this reason.

The myths and traditions of death

 An interesting Guardian article : It is worth reminding ourselves that the vast majority of our ancestors saw the world in a very different...